My therapist told me yesterday that I graduated. I no longer need to see her regularly. I am sure there will be sometime down the road when I will. I will watch something on TV or a Movie that will trigger a PTSD response. But I have learned how to go with it and know I'll make it through it.

I just ran in to JM. We showed up at the drugstore door at the same moment. I greeted him and opened the door for him. He is feeble and wasn’t making a lot of sense. But we stood and talked for a few minutes and wished each other well.

I think that is behind me. PTL

I’m not saying I won’t have another PTSD episode. But God is good and I feel that I have traveled a long healing journey.

My hope and prayer is that this has been helpful to you. Remember, God is good and He will help you to overcome.

I found a devotional on this topic by InterVarsity Press:

Psalm 10: A Prayer of Helplessness

Helplessness. It is an experience shared by everyone. There is no way out. There are no alternatives. It is an experience full of fear, rage and despair. Because our culture places such a high value on individualism and self-reliance, the experience of helplessness is full of shame for us. We expect that others will blame us for letting it happen. And we end up blaming ourselves. In times of helplessness, however, shame and blame are not helpful. What might be helpful is to know that God understands helplessness and that he hears our prayers.

Part of dealing with PTSD is knowing what to stay away from, certain movies and tv shows that bring up the memories, When I went to see Captain Phillips, I balled up in a fetal position and ran from the movie in tears. The main character was in a helpless situation like I was as a child and an adult. I couldn't sit and watch it. I was watching a tv show the other day and it ended with the main character being a victim of child abuse. I never knew the show was going there. Sometimes it can't be helped. But my therapist told me not to see "12 years a slave." so I didn't. Find out as much as you can before you see a program that is going to affect you.

Had surgery last week. Had a Spinal Cord Stimulator implant. Sends an electric current to brain instead of pain. I told my 21 year old son I was like the "Bionic Man." He said "Who's that?" I said "The Six-Million Dollar Man." He said "Who's that?" I said "Lee Majors." He said "Who's that?" I gave up! Generation gap. Then I see him watching a movie. A Disney "Tarzan" movie. Animated. I asked what he was watching. He said "You've never seen Tarzan?" I said "Not the cartoon." He said "They have Tarzan movies that aren't cartoons?" I said "about 20." I was going to mention Johnny Weissmuller, but knew it was no use.

MISTAKES
by Reece B. Sherman

Everyone will mess up sometimes
We will all make a wrong move
None of us is perfect
That is easy to prove

Even when we try our best
We don't always get it right
Some of our mistakes are private
Some are in plain sight

So when you make a mistake
Please do not lose heart
Just try to put it behind you
Move on and have a new start

It may be difficult
Especially when we hurt another
Even if someone expects us to be perfect
If you try to pass that test don't even bother

So just do your best
In everything you do
This is all people actually
Should expect from you

A lot has happened since my last post (I will try to post more often). We've moved into a townhouse..."empty-nest" and loving it. I am having a Spinal Cord Stimulator placed in my spine within the next week or so. I went through a week-long trial and was amazed at the difference it made. I have made several New Year's resolutions. So far...so good. Still struggle with depression, PTSD. Still seeing my therapist monthly.

Three Significant Prayers for the New Year
1. Search Me - Psalm 139:23-24
2. Stretch Me - John 3 - Nicodemus
3. Send Me - Isaiah 6:1-8
And during the New Year may you have: 
enough happiness to keep you sweet - enough trials to keep you strong, enough sorrow to keep you human - enough hope to keep you happy, enough failure to keep you humble - enough success to keep you eager, enough friends to give you comfort - enough wealth to meet your needs, enough enthusiasm to make you look forward to tomorrow, & enough determination to make each day better than the day before.
Lord, please help us to use the 8,760 hours of this year the wisest way we can for you, & for your glory.

These are not only significant prayers, they are dangerous prayers.